John Scalzi
I started off really liking the premise, and still did going forward. But the writing was just insufferable. This style, I later found, is something that John Scalzi is known for. The characters are one-dimensional beings with non-stop banter appreciated by 12 year olds. The protagonists laugh in the face of life-threatening danger, and the villains go into long monologues without taking any action. I’ll introduce some Scalzi like lines here in this review.
I have a few small words for this book on large animals.
There was some light applause, and *insert name here* hooted and gave a quick whistle.
I nodded towards the whistle, and continued, “As I was saying, the book is about Kaijus and preserving them. An excellent concept for a sci-fi book. There must be some characters who are brave; well, it is about preserving Kaiju!”
Everyone laughed.
The characters are all PhDs. And a PhD can obviously master a new world with an “impossible to exist” species in a few weeks. And well, PhDs are condescending, right? They all love to banter. And how they love it! They love it so much, they have forgotten how a normal conversation is had.
To join the KPS, one needs no qualifications. Fitness tests and mental aptitude are for the loser non PhDs. Here, only banter skills are important.
There were a few laughs.
This whole book feels like there is one character who wears different names. Everybody speaks the same. Everybody is a PhD (except our hero who drops out of his PhD program). Everybody is ALWAYS “bickering” and wanting to one-up the other, who is again the same person. Everybody laughs at everything. Everybody is passionate about entering this world full of radiation and dangerous swamp monsters. Everybody is just exhausting. Everybody is the hero and the villain.
The author even brings up “Snow Crash” in the beginning, whose hero is… well, Hiro Protagonist. The irony is surely lost on the author? Or his writing is probably just too advanced for me. Our characters here can be named by a number and an alphabet, and it would make it easier to remember the characters than the names used.
There were a few chuckles at this point.
The Kaiju are walking nuclear reactors with a host of parasite employees to keep them running as per schedule. So far, so good.
There are about 10 Ethan Hunts on base. Sorry, Dr. Ethan Hunts. The KPS is funded by governments and billionaires, most of whom are quite nice, but also very witty and smart. Probably PhDs.
At this point, the entire non-PhD crowd like me gave a rousing cheer.
“I can’t believe I’m the one saying this to you,” Aparna said to Niamh. “But, wow, you’re sure whining a lot right now.”
A random line pulled from this book which basically sums up the entire character spectrum, which is quite small and narrow enough to round off to one.
That said, Scalzi’s strength lies in his world-building and the integration of kaijus into a modern, secret ecosystem.
This is my first book by John Scalzi. While I found the character similarities and relentless banter a bit overwhelming, I appreciate his imaginative approach to the genre. I’m going to give “Old Man’s War” a try because Scalzi’s storytelling and creativity are worth exploring. If the dialogues are going to be the same, then he might not be the author for me, but I’m open to being surprised.
“Just the worst,” Aparna agreed. “History’s worst monster,” I said. “I can still have you shot in the gut,” Sanders said. “Like, all of you.” “Oh, right,” Kahurangi said. He pressed the button, and then tossed the remote back to Sanders. “By the way, I lied.” “You what?” “He lied,” I said. “So did I.” “We all lied,” Aparna said. “Not about liking each other,” Niamh said to Sanders. “We do. And not about you being an asshole. You are.”
I lied about the appreciation too. I really don’t see how anybody over the age of 14 can like this writing style. And shame on the Hugo awards for nominating this book. Surely this couldn’t have been one of the top five in that year?
Everybody jumped out of their seats and clapped and cheered.
*Insert Obama awarding Obama meme*
Sai Tejas 